1. I'm 18. Now I can... do... stuff. Nothing terribly interesting, however, especially since the next major election's outcome has already been decided, essentially. So by the time I am actually interested in voting, I will be 26.
Oh well.
2. New title. For those of you viewing this retrospectively, the blog was previously known as "This is Paul's blog. Seriously." It was a nice title, sure, but I felt like a change.
There must have been a number 3, but it got lost somewhere.
I'm off to bed; see you around later.
...In a purely fabulous sense, of course.
:::Source expected
:::20.01.09
:::STOP
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Monday, January 19, 2009
Interpol should be getting some interesting faxes soon
It was no fun simply ignoring scam/fraud emails, so I've taken to harassing the senders instead.
Date: Sun, 18 Jan 2009 22:55:55 +0100
Subject: FROM: Mr. Patrick K. W. Chan
FROM: Mr. Patrick K. W. Chan
(VICE CHAIRMAN & EXECUTIVE OFFICER)
Bank of China Limited
Hong Kong
I am Mr. Patrick K. W. Chan VICE CHAIRMAN & EXECUTIVE OFFICER of Bank of China
Limited, Hong Kong. I have a lucrative business forums stroke of common
interest to share with you; it involves transferring a large sum of money. I
got your reference in my quest for one that fits my proposed business
relationship. If you are interested in working with me do contact me via my
private e-mail (mrchanpatrwi@yahoo.com.hk) for more information, Should you
please send me your.
Your Full Names:
Phone and Fax:
Country.
Your earliest response to this letter will be appreciated.
Sincerely,
Mr. Mr. Patrick K. W. Chan
Email: mrchanpatrwi@yahoo.com.hk
I can provide you with that information, yes:
Full name: Mr. Ronald Kenneth Noble
Phone: 852 2527 7177
Fax: +33 (0)4 72 44 71 63
Country: United States of America
Sincerely,
Ronald Noble
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Dead Games
Look, we all know I never finish projects.
I get a lot of neat ideas, alright? So things don't often get finished. But the ones I'm motivated enough to see through the end are usually the best ones... Or maybe they just become the best because they're actually finished, heh...
I haven't released a full game in over a year. Sad, really. Hopefully I'll get one done some time soon...
Anyway, you may be interested to take a look at some of my older games that I never ended up finishing.
Here are a few interesting ones:
These are from a game that, as you can probably see, was a scrolling shooter. I'm a pretty big fan of good scrolling shooter types... I haven't played any interesting ones in a while.
Anyway, this one was fairly traditional, but it did have some interesting things going for it.
It had a sort of steampunky setting, first of all, which, while not altogether unheard of, isn't as common as the normal airplane/spaceship stuff.
Also there was a health display that I still think was pretty neat. It was a sort of radar / graph thing that fluctuated up and down; it went to higher levels when you had more health.
Then there was a system that kept track of how much enemy aircraft you had shot down by displaying them as skulls on the left (it was supposed to be similar to the stuff they paint on the sides of planes; swastikas for nazis shot down in WWII, etc.). They slowly decreased, but if you could reach a quota and maintain it until the end of the level, you would be awarded with a special magical attack that could be used a certain number of times per level... They were area-affecting attacks set off with the mouse (giant fireballs and such).
Work on this died out after two levels or so... I moved on to other stuff, I guess.
This one is pretty old, and it kind of shows. It's extremely unlikely that I'll ever come back to this, and if I do, I'd probably start over from scratch.
I've always liked platform shooters quite a bit, too. I had wanted to do one for a while, and finally I was competent enough with GM to do one. I was focusing more on just "making a platform shooter engine" than doing a whole game, so it's not such a huge deal that I never finished with this. I did have ideas for stuff in case I decided to keep going with it, but that never happened. I just got movement, aiming, and shooting down, as well as some basic enemies and destructible blocks.
I don't think I ended up reusing any of this engine, although I did borrow some techniques for later use. Platform shooters I've messed with since then, however, have not featured diagonal aiming.
It's not likely that I'll ever go back and finish this, as ideas I have for it live on in more recent projects (which will probably never surface either, but meh).
This was going to be an open-ended exploration game that put you in control of a submarine called the Proteus and let you explore weird underwater environments and uncover interesting secrets. It never really got of the ground, though; I just did a (pretty cool) submarine graphic, did some basic movement stuff, and put it into a weather thing I had put together. The rain would have only been seen on the surface anyway, of course... I had planned on putting a lot of work into little details like that, so from the start I knew I would probably never finish.
It might be neat to come back to this some day, but I'm not very confident that it will happen.
This game put you in control of one object, but when you found another controllable object you could move up to it and press down. Then you would take control of the new object, and from then on you would be able to switch between the objects in your control by clicking on them.
It was going to be a sort of puzzle/exploration game without any real goal. You would move around, using the abilities of the objects you controlled to access new areas and more objects to control.
The top can spin around to gain speed, and when it's going fast enough, it creates sparks and can smash through obstacles. The rocket can fly for a period of time (eventually it can't go any further and will fall to the ground). The pot can sit in water for a moment to fill itself up, and then it can be poured out somewhere else.
It would have been a pretty interesting game, and out of all of these, I think I'm most interested in finishing this one (but it's still very unlikely that that will ever happen, since I keep getting "better" ideas).
Well, I hope you enjoyed this and/or found it interesting... I could do it a bit more in the future too; I have quite a few dead games.
I may even release playable versions of some, but they never got very far along... I guess it would be interesting to look at them though.
I get a lot of neat ideas, alright? So things don't often get finished. But the ones I'm motivated enough to see through the end are usually the best ones... Or maybe they just become the best because they're actually finished, heh...
I haven't released a full game in over a year. Sad, really. Hopefully I'll get one done some time soon...
Anyway, you may be interested to take a look at some of my older games that I never ended up finishing.
Here are a few interesting ones:
These are from a game that, as you can probably see, was a scrolling shooter. I'm a pretty big fan of good scrolling shooter types... I haven't played any interesting ones in a while.
Anyway, this one was fairly traditional, but it did have some interesting things going for it.
It had a sort of steampunky setting, first of all, which, while not altogether unheard of, isn't as common as the normal airplane/spaceship stuff.
Also there was a health display that I still think was pretty neat. It was a sort of radar / graph thing that fluctuated up and down; it went to higher levels when you had more health.
Then there was a system that kept track of how much enemy aircraft you had shot down by displaying them as skulls on the left (it was supposed to be similar to the stuff they paint on the sides of planes; swastikas for nazis shot down in WWII, etc.). They slowly decreased, but if you could reach a quota and maintain it until the end of the level, you would be awarded with a special magical attack that could be used a certain number of times per level... They were area-affecting attacks set off with the mouse (giant fireballs and such).
Work on this died out after two levels or so... I moved on to other stuff, I guess.
This one is pretty old, and it kind of shows. It's extremely unlikely that I'll ever come back to this, and if I do, I'd probably start over from scratch.
I've always liked platform shooters quite a bit, too. I had wanted to do one for a while, and finally I was competent enough with GM to do one. I was focusing more on just "making a platform shooter engine" than doing a whole game, so it's not such a huge deal that I never finished with this. I did have ideas for stuff in case I decided to keep going with it, but that never happened. I just got movement, aiming, and shooting down, as well as some basic enemies and destructible blocks.
I don't think I ended up reusing any of this engine, although I did borrow some techniques for later use. Platform shooters I've messed with since then, however, have not featured diagonal aiming.
It's not likely that I'll ever go back and finish this, as ideas I have for it live on in more recent projects (which will probably never surface either, but meh).
This was going to be an open-ended exploration game that put you in control of a submarine called the Proteus and let you explore weird underwater environments and uncover interesting secrets. It never really got of the ground, though; I just did a (pretty cool) submarine graphic, did some basic movement stuff, and put it into a weather thing I had put together. The rain would have only been seen on the surface anyway, of course... I had planned on putting a lot of work into little details like that, so from the start I knew I would probably never finish.
It might be neat to come back to this some day, but I'm not very confident that it will happen.
This game put you in control of one object, but when you found another controllable object you could move up to it and press down. Then you would take control of the new object, and from then on you would be able to switch between the objects in your control by clicking on them.
It was going to be a sort of puzzle/exploration game without any real goal. You would move around, using the abilities of the objects you controlled to access new areas and more objects to control.
The top can spin around to gain speed, and when it's going fast enough, it creates sparks and can smash through obstacles. The rocket can fly for a period of time (eventually it can't go any further and will fall to the ground). The pot can sit in water for a moment to fill itself up, and then it can be poured out somewhere else.
It would have been a pretty interesting game, and out of all of these, I think I'm most interested in finishing this one (but it's still very unlikely that that will ever happen, since I keep getting "better" ideas).
Well, I hope you enjoyed this and/or found it interesting... I could do it a bit more in the future too; I have quite a few dead games.
I may even release playable versions of some, but they never got very far along... I guess it would be interesting to look at them though.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Desserts
So there was this little column thing in the newspaper, and the writer had apparently gotten some email with a recipe for a chocolate cake that could be baked in a mug in the microwave.
And she said that a similar recipe for brownies would obviously be "even better".
Huh? Since when was this an undisputed fact?! Or even a generally agreed upon opinion?
Newspapers give me new reasons to hate them every day.
If I were to make a list of the best five desserts, in order, it would look like this:
1. Cookies
2. Jello
3. Ice cream
4. Pie
5. Cake
...As you can see, brownies did not even make the list. Not mine, anyway.
There aren't even that many kinds of brownies. And they're all boring.
Furthermore, if the list were to continue, it would go something like:
6. Popsicles
7. Pudding
I would put in milkshakes and shaved ice and other frozen dessert type things, but they're fairly similar to ice cream, popsicles, and either ice cream or popsicles, respectively. So they may not deserve their own entry.
Anyway, brownies would probably not even make the top ten. I just don't like them that much. I mean, they're OK; I'll eat them. But they've got nothing on cookies. The great thing about cookies is that there are so many kinds, and they aren't so difficult to make so there are many opportunities to eat them.
Jello gets second because it's simple and tasty and there's lots of cool stuff you can do to make it even better (whipped cream, fruit, etc.).
:::Source expected
:::17.01.08
:::STOP
And she said that a similar recipe for brownies would obviously be "even better".
Huh? Since when was this an undisputed fact?! Or even a generally agreed upon opinion?
Newspapers give me new reasons to hate them every day.
If I were to make a list of the best five desserts, in order, it would look like this:
1. Cookies
2. Jello
3. Ice cream
4. Pie
5. Cake
...As you can see, brownies did not even make the list. Not mine, anyway.
There aren't even that many kinds of brownies. And they're all boring.
Furthermore, if the list were to continue, it would go something like:
6. Popsicles
7. Pudding
I would put in milkshakes and shaved ice and other frozen dessert type things, but they're fairly similar to ice cream, popsicles, and either ice cream or popsicles, respectively. So they may not deserve their own entry.
Anyway, brownies would probably not even make the top ten. I just don't like them that much. I mean, they're OK; I'll eat them. But they've got nothing on cookies. The great thing about cookies is that there are so many kinds, and they aren't so difficult to make so there are many opportunities to eat them.
Jello gets second because it's simple and tasty and there's lots of cool stuff you can do to make it even better (whipped cream, fruit, etc.).
:::Source expected
:::17.01.08
:::STOP
Friday, January 16, 2009
My blog in relation to other blogs
So I realized that I've hit an all-time low.
All around me, people are surpassing (or coming very close to) my number of posts. And these people, I should remind you, were presumably inspired to begin blogging because I did (though they have not all admitted that this is the case).
But that's when I realized some things.
Firstly, it's not necessarily quantity that counts, but quality. Every pixel of every letter of every word of every post here is dripping with alarming levels of awesomeness. And depending on what browser you're using, you can zoom in and each letter has a higher resolution, making it even more awesome.
And secondly, as I noted before, my starting a blog caused something like four people to start blogs as well. So I must be doing something right.
Plus, I have demonstrated my complete lack of respect for any Internet courtesy by posting two posts in one day for two days in a row. Some might consider this "against the rules", "weird", or "unfair". But I simply say "BAH."
If we couple this with my apparent disregard for any form of conventional modesty, we can see that I must be some form of robot.
And everyone wants to read a blog written by a robot.
...Which, now that I think about it, may have been the basic premise of this blog in the first place.
So it looks like I'm doing a pretty good job here.
:::Source expected
:::16.01.09
:::STOP
All around me, people are surpassing (or coming very close to) my number of posts. And these people, I should remind you, were presumably inspired to begin blogging because I did (though they have not all admitted that this is the case).
But that's when I realized some things.
Firstly, it's not necessarily quantity that counts, but quality. Every pixel of every letter of every word of every post here is dripping with alarming levels of awesomeness. And depending on what browser you're using, you can zoom in and each letter has a higher resolution, making it even more awesome.
And secondly, as I noted before, my starting a blog caused something like four people to start blogs as well. So I must be doing something right.
Plus, I have demonstrated my complete lack of respect for any Internet courtesy by posting two posts in one day for two days in a row. Some might consider this "against the rules", "weird", or "unfair". But I simply say "BAH."
If we couple this with my apparent disregard for any form of conventional modesty, we can see that I must be some form of robot.
And everyone wants to read a blog written by a robot.
...Which, now that I think about it, may have been the basic premise of this blog in the first place.
So it looks like I'm doing a pretty good job here.
:::Source expected
:::16.01.09
:::STOP
A message to the Internet at large:
Please refrain from using the phrase "epic fail".
The word "epic" has been abused so badly that it is now some sort of expletive. Until further notice you should replace most of the letters with asterisks: e***.
Meanwhile, when you say "fail", the word you actually mean to use is "failure", which is a noun. "Fail" is, in fact, a verb.
The use of the phrase "epic fail" and similar derivatives such as "epic win" is henceforth an offense that is punishable by GWAWOD.
Thank you,
Paul M-unit 19.91 MKII
Head of the Internet Law Enforcement linguistics division
The word "epic" has been abused so badly that it is now some sort of expletive. Until further notice you should replace most of the letters with asterisks: e***.
Meanwhile, when you say "fail", the word you actually mean to use is "failure", which is a noun. "Fail" is, in fact, a verb.
The use of the phrase "epic fail" and similar derivatives such as "epic win" is henceforth an offense that is punishable by GWAWOD.
Thank you,
Paul M-unit 19.91 MKII
Head of the Internet Law Enforcement linguistics division
Thursday, January 15, 2009
An Earlier Post Revisited
Right, so.
I'm going to take a break momentarily from my new format or whatever you want to call it to do something a bit more serious.
I was reading through some posts from about a year ago and found at least one that I want to rewrite. Looking at it, I realized it was quite odd and the message was easy to misconstrue. I had planned on following it up, but I never did, and on its own, it's pretty sorry-looking.
So when thinking about rewriting it, I kind of ended up going off on different paths of thought, but regardless this will be sufficient to justify the removal of the earlier post.
I kind of like the idea of rewriting posts, actually; as time goes on, I grow to dislike earlier "work", and I really don't want to start trimming at my blog archive or anything, so I favor this option.
Now, in this post, I was talking about atheism, and the things I was hearing Christians say about it.
There are some atheists, however, who do indeed say things like "Hey, you stupid person, believing in stuff you can't prove! Haha, you're stupid!"
And to you I must ask this: Why? Certainly there are dumb people with odd superstitions that they blindly follow. Many of these people believe things that are extremely similar to what I believe. But that doesn't give you any reason to automatically assume that anyone you meet who believes in any god is automatically a moron. Some of us have actually given serious thought to what we believe and have concluded that logically and scientifically it is the only answer. I assume that is the same reason you are atheists. Because that makes the most sense to you. But has it not occurred to you that someone else has gone through a similar thought process and come to an entirely different conclusion? They're not stupid. They're just as smart as you, but they think differently.
So the problem on both sides is that there is too much assumption going on. Assumption seems to frequently be the cause of strife.
I could go on, but you get the picture.
Two posts in one day. That doesn't happen too often... They were so seperate that it would have been silly to include them both in the same post.
:::Source expected
:::15.01.09
:::STOP
I'm going to take a break momentarily from my new format or whatever you want to call it to do something a bit more serious.
I was reading through some posts from about a year ago and found at least one that I want to rewrite. Looking at it, I realized it was quite odd and the message was easy to misconstrue. I had planned on following it up, but I never did, and on its own, it's pretty sorry-looking.
So when thinking about rewriting it, I kind of ended up going off on different paths of thought, but regardless this will be sufficient to justify the removal of the earlier post.
I kind of like the idea of rewriting posts, actually; as time goes on, I grow to dislike earlier "work", and I really don't want to start trimming at my blog archive or anything, so I favor this option.
Now, in this post, I was talking about atheism, and the things I was hearing Christians say about it.
...[Lately] people have been saying/thinking things like "Atheism is on the rise!", "Be able to defend against these constant attacks from atheists!", and "Beware of atheism's new levels of influence!"Now, to Christians, or, hey, theists in general: OK, seriously, what's your deal? Why is it that you are assuming all atheists are out to get you or something? I mean, I've known many, and it's not like they all said, "Hey, you stupid person, believing in stuff you can't prove! Haha, you're stupid!" I mean, the difference between beliefs is certainly not the same sort of thing as the difference of beliefs between two theists. But I don't understand all the hate. What exactly does it accomplish? Nothing. It usually doesn't. You can't just assume someone dislikes you because they believe differently, and then strike at them at every opportunity. Now you have given them reason to hate you; congratulations.
Well, I think that's kinda silly.
There are some atheists, however, who do indeed say things like "Hey, you stupid person, believing in stuff you can't prove! Haha, you're stupid!"
And to you I must ask this: Why? Certainly there are dumb people with odd superstitions that they blindly follow. Many of these people believe things that are extremely similar to what I believe. But that doesn't give you any reason to automatically assume that anyone you meet who believes in any god is automatically a moron. Some of us have actually given serious thought to what we believe and have concluded that logically and scientifically it is the only answer. I assume that is the same reason you are atheists. Because that makes the most sense to you. But has it not occurred to you that someone else has gone through a similar thought process and come to an entirely different conclusion? They're not stupid. They're just as smart as you, but they think differently.
So the problem on both sides is that there is too much assumption going on. Assumption seems to frequently be the cause of strife.
I could go on, but you get the picture.
Two posts in one day. That doesn't happen too often... They were so seperate that it would have been silly to include them both in the same post.
:::Source expected
:::15.01.09
:::STOP
Great Internet Ideas
OK, you enterprising individuals out there who are looking to get in on the webberspace scene, here are some incredibly awesome ideas that have never been done before.
Friendly Dungeons of Simultaneous Fun and Terror (FDoSFaT)
[Social networking roguelike]
Connect with friends and discuss whatever you like whilst slaying fiendish monsters! Every time you log in, you receive such questions as "Do you want me to choose a list of random friends for you that may or may not include people you actually know in real life? (y/n/q)"
Finally, you can waste time and waste time at the same time!
WikiBullets
[The free FPS that anyone can edit]
If you find that your terrain is not advantageous, drop in a trench and some defensive machine gun platforms. If a weapon is not strong enough for you, mess with it until it can nuke a city block with one shot and has infinite ammunition.
It's completely unbalanced, but it's fun because it's not actually cheating!
Seas of Blubber Online
[Massively multiplayer online whaling game]
Tired of endless grinding, boring combat systems, and generic fantasy settings? Well then, this is the online game for you. Travel across the ocean slaughtering whales, running from cannibals, and selling fat and oil on the black market. Your worth is not measured by "levels" but instead simply by how much money you have. It's incredibly realistic!
...There may be more where that came from later.
:::Source expected
:::15.01.09
:::STOP
Friendly Dungeons of Simultaneous Fun and Terror (FDoSFaT)
[Social networking roguelike]
Connect with friends and discuss whatever you like whilst slaying fiendish monsters! Every time you log in, you receive such questions as "Do you want me to choose a list of random friends for you that may or may not include people you actually know in real life? (y/n/q)"
Finally, you can waste time and waste time at the same time!
WikiBullets
[The free FPS that anyone can edit]
If you find that your terrain is not advantageous, drop in a trench and some defensive machine gun platforms. If a weapon is not strong enough for you, mess with it until it can nuke a city block with one shot and has infinite ammunition.
It's completely unbalanced, but it's fun because it's not actually cheating!
Seas of Blubber Online
[Massively multiplayer online whaling game]
Tired of endless grinding, boring combat systems, and generic fantasy settings? Well then, this is the online game for you. Travel across the ocean slaughtering whales, running from cannibals, and selling fat and oil on the black market. Your worth is not measured by "levels" but instead simply by how much money you have. It's incredibly realistic!
...There may be more where that came from later.
:::Source expected
:::15.01.09
:::STOP
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Haud Voluntas Quodcumque
From now on I should just post way more often.
No matter what it is. As long as it's a post.
It's such a brilliant idea.
In fact, I'm going to start right now.
Right click > view for full size (not that it's terribly large)... Or actually I think you can just click on it.
Yeah, it's awesome.
Well, let's hope this lasts longer than today. It is reasonably likely that I will see you metaphorically some time in the future.
:::Source expected
:::14.01.09
:::STOP
No matter what it is. As long as it's a post.
It's such a brilliant idea.
In fact, I'm going to start right now.
Right click > view for full size (not that it's terribly large)... Or actually I think you can just click on it.
Yeah, it's awesome.
Well, let's hope this lasts longer than today. It is reasonably likely that I will see you metaphorically some time in the future.
:::Source expected
:::14.01.09
:::STOP
Monday, January 5, 2009
Brief Gripings
Hooray for monthly posting schedules!
...?
Or no.
Now, the situation may have changed since last I knew and rendered this irrelevant (interesting things have been happening in very quick succession so you never know).
But whatever:
Roland Burris, for accepting the senate seat proposed to him, either:
A. Is crazy
or
B. Has no clue what's going on
But nobody can figure out which one because all the wrong questions are being asked, and all he ever says is "Hey, it's completely legal!"
Well, we all know that. But that's the whole problem! Since it's legal, he'll probably eventually get the seat. But if he had had any dignity, he would have refused it, because whether Blagojevitch has the power to appoint someone to the senate does not change whether he deserves that power.
Thus, we are stuck in one of those frequently occurring and oh-so-puzzling situations where the law presents a stark contrast with morality.
People aren't saying that Roland Burris shouldn't be seated because they just don't like him or because they think it's not legal, but because they think it's not right.
So back to what I was saying: The interviewers are asking the wrong questions.
If you're an interviewer and are reading this (as if that is likely to happen...), here's a suggested question:
"Overlooking the ridiculousness of this hypothetical situation, what if Adolf Hitler came back from the dead? And what if he was somehow elected -- through an entirely legal and normal means -- to the position of Illinois governor?
Would you accept an appointment to the senate from him?"
If he says yes, we know that we are looking at case A. If he says no, we know that we are looking at case B.
If he dodges the question, well, he's a politician. Not to be too stereotyping, but... that's what they do.
And then we would still be confused.
...That's it for today.
:::Source expected
:::05.01.09
:::STOP
...?
Or no.
Now, the situation may have changed since last I knew and rendered this irrelevant (interesting things have been happening in very quick succession so you never know).
But whatever:
Roland Burris, for accepting the senate seat proposed to him, either:
A. Is crazy
or
B. Has no clue what's going on
But nobody can figure out which one because all the wrong questions are being asked, and all he ever says is "Hey, it's completely legal!"
Well, we all know that. But that's the whole problem! Since it's legal, he'll probably eventually get the seat. But if he had had any dignity, he would have refused it, because whether Blagojevitch has the power to appoint someone to the senate does not change whether he deserves that power.
Thus, we are stuck in one of those frequently occurring and oh-so-puzzling situations where the law presents a stark contrast with morality.
People aren't saying that Roland Burris shouldn't be seated because they just don't like him or because they think it's not legal, but because they think it's not right.
So back to what I was saying: The interviewers are asking the wrong questions.
If you're an interviewer and are reading this (as if that is likely to happen...), here's a suggested question:
"Overlooking the ridiculousness of this hypothetical situation, what if Adolf Hitler came back from the dead? And what if he was somehow elected -- through an entirely legal and normal means -- to the position of Illinois governor?
Would you accept an appointment to the senate from him?"
If he says yes, we know that we are looking at case A. If he says no, we know that we are looking at case B.
If he dodges the question, well, he's a politician. Not to be too stereotyping, but... that's what they do.
And then we would still be confused.
...That's it for today.
:::Source expected
:::05.01.09
:::STOP
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